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Google is going to take over the World. And there’s nothing we want to do about it.

Secret lairs. Incredible and unbelievable plans for feats of technological genius that will change the world as we know it. Knowledge of the inner workings of government, businesses and the human psyche. 

Then there’s the money. Lots of money. Heaps and piles of wealth that pour through the hands of geniuses whose job it is to predict and build the future.

Sounds like a James Bond secretive super villain bent on world domination, right?

Well, you got the world domination part right. But in this story, there’s no hero running to our rescue, and instead of a crazed villain stroking overly fluffy cats, there’s a company. A company that has one of the world’s largest and most recognizable brands.

World, meet the next James Bond world dominating super villain. 

It’s Google.


Google is the world’s most popular search engine.

That’s right. Despite all desperate attempts by “rivals”, Yahoo and Bing, in 2013, Google directed 70 percent of all search queries. 

In my mind, that’s actually surprising low, considering that in Canada and the US at least, Google is a verb, meaning “let’s find the answer to any obscure or well-known problem, factoid, how-to guide, recipe, joke, time zone, date, temperature or any other response that was previously up for debate but is now an easily found and irrefutable fact with the power to redirect arguments and small talk.

It’s true. Google it.

But what does that have to do with world domination? Well, thanks to the onward march towards increasingly larger data storage centres with capacities as near to limitless as ever in history, Google is able to store, amalgamate and disseminate reams of information from your attempts to track down that Trivial Pursuit answer.

This data is valuable. Very valuable. Increasingly, it is running the online and IRL world of commerce. That means businesses are willing to pay.

We all know that the James Bond super villain has looooooads of cash. That’s how he built the lair on the moon.


Speaking of secret lairs….

Google has one. Or two. Maybe even more. They are a secret, right?

Bloomberg Businessweek was invited for a small tour of Google’s Secret Lab, cleverly monikered Google X. This is where all the crazy ideas and plans that Google has for future projects, like driverless cars and even teleportation are tossed about. According to Bloomberg, nothing is off limits or considered impossible.

Sharks with laser beams on their heads, anyone? Hollywood should be more careful what they dream up. Apparently anything we can dream up, Google is busily making reality.


Like the dreams of worldwide internet access, for example.

The internet is the greatest technological tool we’ve created since the industrial revolution. The internal combustion engine physically brought the world closer. The internet brings people closer, culturally, socially, and psychologically. 

The one limitation on the internet’s true democratic and equal opportunity potential is access to infrastructure. There are still those who struggle to get good internet access to their homes, communities and schools.

Now what if a company were to realize the untapped potential of bringing millions of new users online with superior high speed internet connections? What would that company gain for their investment in free fibre optic internet connections to remote locations?

Google knows. Enter Google Fibre. 

It’s simply brilliant as far as world domination goes. Looking for new markets? Leverage your billions to create them. You can’t guarantee they’ll be devoted Google users, but really. They will be. Because you just can’t get away from it. 


Which brings me to my final point.

We may be too late. Google may actually already have conquered the world and is graciously allowing us to continue to live here so that they can continue to leverage our voracious and unstoppable online consumption to their own ends.

Google Android is now the top selling mobile operating system in the market with 81 percent of the market wrapped up in Q3 2013.

Google owns YouTube. Despite protests their new comment system stinks, are we going to stop using YouTube? Nope, no and nuh-uh.

Google Plus was a flop for social media, but guess what? As a business, you need to be there because it boosts your SEO. So there you are.

For the future, who knows? There is talk of improving Gmail money transfers, the aforementioned self-driving car technology, and Google Now, a personal assistant with a more natural language user interface that predicts what you will want. Full blown mind reading cannot be far behind.


So what do we do about it?

We all know how James Bond movie villains fare. There’s a high-speed chase and tense-nail biting to the finish as the villain is brought down by our illustrious hero.

Who’s our hero going to be now? Who comes even close to taking on Google? Once they have a self driving car, they will win every high speed car chase!

So far, there’s been little to no opposition to the Google march to world supremacy. In fact, most of us are willing participants. For good or bad, Google’s may have found the perfect way to get us to go along – by giving us what we want – and using that to build an empire.

For more reading, check out:

“Google’s Plan to take over the World,” Steve Kovach, Business Insider.


Every fact and linked article in this post was extensively and exhaustively researched. Using Google. What did you expect?

How is Google already part of your everday life? Leave us some comments!


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